Chris Schmidt (crschmidt) wrote,
Chris Schmidt

Back from philmont 6/29/2001

SAT and ACT scores came back. SAT was 1540, ACT 34. Great scores, but with my crappy grades who knows how far they'll get me :-P. I'm back from philmont - 10 days of backpacking over 75 miles of New Mexican mountains with a crew of 11 other boy scouts of america such as myself. Today i went out and applied for jobs, although tomorrow i'm going to go to osco and apply, since they said they'd take me back. if i made some decent money, that might not be such a bad job, but 6 bucks an hour just don't cut it. Plus, the crappy hours and everything... anyway, i'll see how it works out. I also applied to 3 local banks and to blue goose. After long discussions with many people about my personal life (Drew, Ben, KatRag, etc.) i've decided that i've got to become more active and conformist socially. It sucks that to get what i want i have to fit in, but in high school, it truly is a fact of life. My favorite quote has always been "i'm not going to change my ways just to please you or appease you" - but that's no longer true. i just can't take it anymore - the goddamn lonliness that i deal with sometimes is infuriating. So, no more crazy haired, wild dancing chris. if you see me at dances, i'll probly be in a corner, trying to hold down the alcoholic beverages i consumed just hours before (not really, but it's the concept behind it). Sure it's nice to say "i'm not going to let others opinions sway me" but it's an awful hard way to live. and if you really mean it - just saying it isn't enough, you have to live by it. I've done that for the past who knows how many years, and it's gotten me absolutely no where. I'm done with that now - it's time to move into the stage that every other high schooler learns to live with in freshman year - you can't get no where unless you fit in. anyway, it's 2.11 in the morning on the 30th, and the parents will be busting me soon, so i'm gonna say good night for now.

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