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it's really over
photogeek
crschmidt
I was in love.

For almost a year, I've been attached to Sarah. I've spent every minute with her, talking to her, thinking about her.

9 months ago, I lent her the Moulin Rouge DVD that she gave me as a graduation gift. She had mono at the time, and I thought watching that movie would make her feel at least a little bit better.

It did make her feel better, and she kept it. I had a copy at school, so it wasn't a big deal.

Today, I got that DVD back. I also got back the webcam she's had since before I left for school, and a shirt I had lent her for sadies.

It's over. I may never see the girl I loved again.

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dear, things that are meant to be work themselves out. that's a really tough concept to buy into but if you do, i promise you'll feel better. if you and sarah are meant to be, there isn't anything either of you can do to keep that from happening. perhaps the timing just isn't right. maybe you have things you need to learn, and the same with her.
the hardest part is giving it time, being patient and letting things run their course.

<333

Ouch... sorry to hear that. That you got it all back... *hugs* Got my fingers crossed for you.

I could smother you with tired clichés, but you really don't want that. I'm sorry, I know it hurts. :(

*points to what Liz said* I'm sorry that it didn't work out. Waaah. <3<3

Sigh.

Closure's a bitch.

Not having it is worse.

I'm glad you got those things back. They wouldn't write songs about breaking up if it were easy.

Ironically, today I was thinking about the day my first boyfriend broke up with me, and how sad I wasn't (we hadn't spoken for a month). And how I had to return his ring the next time I saw him, and how important it was to both of us that I do that.

"the recording industry as we know it wouldn't exist without breakups"

I agree :/ There are several things I wanted to give back to my ex after we split but he refused to take them back. Things that I thought were really important for him to have (like some of his rare childhood pics) :/


Not having it is worse.

I hear you there.

I'll second that.

It's a bitch not having complete closure... especially when you've moved on and KNOW there wasn't closure from the last relationship.

ps: *hug* chris.

I can't offer any advice, or anything at all really, but I hope you feel better and know that there's tons of people here willing to listen to you and remind you how great you are.

Everytime a door closes, another one is opened.

You will be happy again. It could be lurking around the corner. You just need to go out and get it.

I don't want it. I never did. I wanted what I had, and I threw it all away.

Be content with the fact that you have had it, known what it feels like, for many many people never get to feel like that.

You should want it. You should want to be happy again, out of this depressive, 'I don't care' state as that tends to worry people.

You're the one who made it so patently obvious that I don't care. *shrug*

I'm lucky that I got to know what it feels like, sure. but I can tell you right now, that as soon as you know what it feels like, you also know what pain feels like, and that's not a happy thing.

It was a great time. I had great experiences. But in this moment, right now, I can't honestly say I wouldn't give it all up to just be my stupid immature self again.

She's the most amazing person in the world, she really is. I wanted it to work so bad. I wanted to be with HER forever, not someone else.

I gave it all up. I know why in my mind, but my heart will never understand.

I'm just trying to point that this isn't the end of the world...

I'm not looking forward to my first heartbreak either, but it's just one of those things that everybody has -- unless you marry that said person and then end up with a divorce in ten or so years.

If anything ... Give both of you some time and maybe you can try again with her.

sorry to hear that, man :(

I'm lucky that I got to know what it feels like, sure. but I can tell you right now, that as soon as you know what it feels like, you also know what pain feels like, and that's not a happy thing.

It was a great time. I had great experiences. But in this moment, right now, I can't honestly say I wouldn't give it all up to just be my stupid immature self again.

She's the most amazing person in the world, she really is. I wanted it to work so bad. I wanted to be with HER forever, not someone else.


i know exactly what you mean, and yes, it really really does suck a lot. and i'm sure you wish it could all be how it used to be, when everything was perfect and happy and you were going to be with sarah forever and ever and live happily ever after. i felt the same exact way.

people were telling me the same things... "one door closes another opens" "there's plenty of fish in the sea"...
but THAT is the door i wanted, and i didn't want any of the other fish, because i didn't love the other fish like i loved my girl. if you wanna talk or whatever, i know how you feel.

The difference is your fish came back.

I'm not upset at you, I'm not pissed or anything. But I'm going to offer advice: you've got one of the best girls in the world. I did too, and I gave it up. Don't give yours up.

Look, a non-pitying comment! Amazing!

you're right that our situations are different, my fish came back, and i am extremely happy because of it :)

i know i have an amazing girlfriend. she's awesome, she's sweet, she's beautiful, and so much more that i can't put into words.

however, for a few weeks, i felt the same exact thing you're feeling now. my fish had left me, and, at the time, i didn't think it was going to swim back.

all i can say is... when i was going through what you're going through now, i tried my hardest to live my life as normal as i could. yes, i was heartbroken, sad, devastated, etc, but i survived. i went out on the weekends with my friends and just tried to get on with life. it made it not so bad to just be normal. might wanna try it, it helped me. best of luck

How confusing.

Chris, you're acting in this comments like you're the one who got dumped...

But you're the one who swam away, and you know it...

Agh...confusion. =/

(Please don't be mad at me...=/)

You didn't throw it all away. It's not your fault, is it? I mean, okay, it's both of our faults. I realize that. I'm not going to say it's my fault anymore because it isn't. It's some my fault and some yours. It could have worked, and it could have been wonderful, I think. But something in you doesn't agree with that, and you don't or feel you don't or don't want to love me anymore. Without love, this relationship is pointless. Maybe it wouldn't be in the high school years, if it was both of us, but it's not fun or practical to carry out our long distance relationship if you really don't want to be with me anymore. I don't want you to be sad, just as you don't want me to be. You left with both of us in tears. Neither of us got to see the last of each other even smiling...it ended in tears. I'm going to miss you a hell of a lot but don't remember me as that. Remember me as the girl you used to be happy to have and to hold and to hug and to kiss and to miss.


Every thing I say is going to sound like shit right now. just, hold on. and stuff. your a great guy, and I'm sure life will fix it self, Love involved or no. Love is messed up, any how.

~N~


There is nothing I can tell you about heartbreak that you didn't learn instantly when you felt it. I can tell you, though, that it's okay to let yourself just hurt for awhile, and to take some time to grieve before you feel like moving on -- and, one day, you will feel like moving on, if you let yourself. *hugs.* Hang in there.

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