Chris Schmidt (crschmidt) wrote,
Chris Schmidt

In fifth grade, I learned something very important:

You can't be chased if you don't run.

One of my female friends was constantly chased by "the annoying kid" in 5th grade. He would run around and try and catch her. She would always run. It's a reaction that's not hard to understand: no one wants to get caught, and no one wants to just stand there and get caught. So she ran.

One day, I was standing around, and she had finally gotten fed up with being chased. She went to the teacher. In fifth grade, I was a teachers pet, so I was always around. This is something I remember quite clearly to this day almost 8 years later.

"Ms. Hornbostel, Kevin is always chasing me."
"So don't run."
"Whaaa?" (yes, she actually said it like that. she was a strange girl)
"Don't run when he chases you."
"Oh, I get it, he'll be so confused his puny little mind won't be..."
"No. It's very simple. He's only chasing you so he can chase you. If you don't run, he won't chase you."

You can't be chased if you don't run.
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